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正文 第84節 文 / [英]弗吉尼亞•伍爾芙

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    beent.

    “ihavenotspokenaean,”

    headded.

    “tellthenean,”shesaidat

    length.

    asifobeyinganinstinct,theybothstopped

    and,bendingslightlyoverthebalustradeoftheriver,

    lookedintothefloer.

    “yousaythattobeho,”ralphbegan.

    “veryrytotellyouthefacts;butiwayou,

    youllthinkd.itsafact,though,thatsinceifirst

    saonthsagoihavedeyou,inan

    utterlyabsurdyideal.ilstashad

    totellyouethe

    thingthatttersstinlife.”hecheckedhielf.

    “houtknothatyourebeautiful,and

    allthat,iveetobelievethatesortof

    agreent;thatethingtogether;thatwe

    seesothing.ivegotintothehabitofigining

    you;ilhinkingyoudsayordo;iwalk

    aloreettalkingtoyou;idreafyou.itsrely

    abadhabit,asing;itsan

    experiene;well,

    thosearethefacts.”

    siltaneously,theybothwalkedonveryslowly.

    “ifyoueyouhis,”

    shesaid.“knoherwevealwaysbeen

    interrupted.ethisthatday

    auntsca”sheasked,rellegtheene.

    258

    virginiawoolf

    hebowedhishead.

    “thedayyoutoldofyagent,”hesaid.

    shethought,hastart,thatshewasnolaged.

    “idenythatishouldceasetofeelthisifiknewyou,”

    heorereasonablythatsall.

    ishouldnttalkthekindofnonsealkedtonight

    .butitnonsehetruth,”hesaiddoggedly.

    “itstheiortantthing.youetotalk

    asifthisfeelingforyouion,butall

    ourfeelingsarethat.thebestoftherehalfillusions.

    still,”headded,asifarguingtohielf,“ifitas

    realafeelingasiapableof,ishouldntbeging

    lifeonyourat.”

    “ean”sheinquired.

    “itoldyou.iakingattage.iivingup

    profession.”

    “onat”sheasked,i.

    “yes,onyourat,”hereplied.heexplainedhis

    aningnofurther.

    “butidontknostances,”shesaid

    atlast,ashereinedsilent.

    “youhavenoopinionaboutoher”

    “yes,isupposeihaveanopinion”shehesitated.

    hentrolledhisoaskhertoexplainherself,

    andchtohispleasuresheon,appearingtosearch

    hernd.

    “ithoughtthatyoucriticizedperhapsdisliked.

    ithoughtofyouasapersonwhojudges”

    “no;ipersone.

    “tell,then,adeyoudothis”sheasked,

    afterabreak.

    hetoldherinanorderlyokeningcarefulpreparation,

    allthathehadanttosayatfirst;hoood

    other

    hadsaid,andhissisterjoanhadrefrainedfroaying;

    exaeatthebank;

    prospecthisbrotherhadofeaingalivelihoodin

    arichouchoftheirineo,and

    otherdetailsknobyheart.shelisteoall

    this,sothatsheuldhavepassedanexanationinit

    bythetierle;ashe

    259

    nightandday

    orelisteningtoitthahe

    pavingstoherfeet.shehan

    shehadfeltinherlife.ifdenhaldhaveseenhow

    visiblybooksofalgebraicsyols,pagesallspeckledh

    dotsanddashesandtebeforehereyes

    astheytrodtheeanknt,hissecretjoyientihthavebeendispersed.sheon,saying,

    “yes,isee.buthohathelpyouyour

    brotherhaspassedhisexanation”sosensibly,that

    hehadnstantlytokeephisbraininchedallthe

    tishehroughatelespeat

    eshadodisksheril

    shefeltherselfpossessedoftwobodies,onewalkingby

    theriver,theotherratedtoasilver

    globealoftinthefinebluespaof

    vaporsthathevisible

    theskyondsahatnostaro

    piercetheflightoferycloudsnrapidly

    beforethewind.shelookeddownhurriedlyagain.

    therehisfeeling

    ofhappiness;shefree;shealone;she

    illionfibres;everysteptook

    heearerho.heless,sheexultedasshehadnever

    exultedbefore.theairoredistinct,

    theldstohebalustradelderandharder,

    ruckherhandagainstit.

    nofeelingofannoyancereined;hecertainly

    didnothinderanyflightsheghtake,

    e;but

    thatherndition,ortoanythingthathe

    hadsaid,shehadnonsciousall.

    theyofcabsand

    oibusesthesurreysideofthe

    river;thesoundofthetraffiotorhos,

    andthelightbellssoundedreandre

    distinctly,and,e

    silent.ninstincttheyslaedtheir

    paeofseprivacyallowed

    thetoralph,thepleasureoftheselastyardsofthe

    hkatharihatheuldnotlook

    beyondthepresentnttothetiwhensheshould

    havelefthihehadnoontsof

    260

    virginiawoolf

    theirpanionshipinaddingfreshohe

    hadalreadysaid.siheyhadstoppedtalking,she

    hadbeetohiotsocharealperson,asthe

    veryanhedreaof;buthissolitarydreahad

    neverproduysuchkeennessofsensationasthat

    selfrangely

    transfigured.hehadpletesteryofallhisfaculties.

    forthefirsttiheossessionofhisfull

    poseedto

    havenoperceptibleend.buttheodhadhe

    restlessnessorfeverishdesiretoaddonedelighttoanother

    arked,andsospoilt,

    thestrapturousofhisiginings.itoodthat

    tooksuan

    lifethathedisturbedinthe

    ...
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