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正文 第11节 文 / [美]博恩·崔西/罗恩·阿登

    栗子小说    m.lizi.tw小说站  www.xsz.tw栗子小说    m.lizi.twiveto

    bodylanguagethanaren.researchshohata

    anjoinasocialgatheringoffiftyuplesand

    assessthestateofeachoftheirrelationshipshinabout

    tennutesofenteringtherooanuldspend

    hoursinthesaroondhavenoideaening

    intherelationshipsoftheotheruples.

    rononntrollingyourbodysaystoothers

    ionceageached

    bruceebyhisotoey.it

    inhathis

    neployershadfraudulentlysrepreseheelves.

    heobedeposedonvideobyanotably

    aggressivedefeoey.tocheckouthowhewould

    doonvideo,hisattoeydidsoroleplaying

    aionedhisthoughheuallybeing

    deposed.hererdedtheresultandthenplayeditback.

    onelookandhecalledin.

    ideyohatpurpose,his

    attoeyhadsuppliedhalistofquestionsthat

    bruceghtfaceduriioning.whenhearrived,i

    sathioyvideocara.theniroleplayed

    beingtheopposingunselandined

    hint,ijustranthroughsoofthe

    questionstoseehoighteacrosstothejury.

    thesixthsignal:bodylanguagetoavoid

    theniplayedbatosee.itwasa

    realsho.

    brudressedinexpensive

    butnoightfittingclothes.therehehevideo

    nitor,sluedbahischair,hhisstraining

    bellyalstpoppionsoffhisshirt.herarely

    gedhispositioninanyped.even

    aspedbackathe

    cara.

    iplayedba,“letsbe

    objeberofthejury

    knoan,hoeacrosstoyou”

    hebeingastupidnandtriedtobetruthful

    abouthispersonalevaluation.“helooksalittleover

    andperhapsalittletoosureofhielf.idont

    thinkheakeagoodiression.”

    heihevideoandsaid,

    “infapression.”

    hetuedandlookedatandsaid,“ifyouwerea

    erofthejuryhoeacrosstoyou”

    houthesitatingisaid,“fatcatlaakesalotof

    ney,sg,arrogant,doesntgiveada.theyreall

    alikeillsho”

    thepointisthatbruecessarilyanyofthose

    things,buthisbodylanguageandtotaldeanorcreated

    thatiression.andthatshowhewouldbejudged.

    sothiobedone.

    alittle

    toavoidstraininghisbuttoned

    thepo

    jacket,satupright,softenedhisvoidevenleaned

    forhenasthoughheoanswer

    theirquestions.igefrobr >

    “thefatcat”to“thegentlegiant.”hease.

    sotispeoplefoldtheirarorslu,sily

    becauseitsfortabletodoso.iknowido.when

    yourehpeopleyoushouldalwaysbeawareofsignals

    thatydiately

    getheo,

    tobeustbeinntrolof

    akesureyouaresending

    outalltherightsignals.

    yourtoolsforgothers

    beaeandatwork.

    nsessageofth,

    heandstand.

    observethebodylanguageofotherstoseekindof

    ssagestheyaresending.tudoeonyour

    televisionandtrytoascertainthedifferentactorsare

    thinkingorsaying.

    chapter16

    theseventhsignal:

    vocalreassurances

    friendshipredoublethjoysandcuttethgriefsinhalves.

    forthereisnonthatiartethhisjoystohisfriend,

    buthejoyeththere;andnonthatiarteth

    hisgriefstohisfriend,buthegrieveththeless.

    francisban

    youicethatgood,activelistenersalways

    kelittlenoiseslike“uhhuh,”“aah,”

    “h,”orotherassortedsounds.thesearewe

    liketocall“vocalreassuraheyareclearindicators

    ofsooention.theyareeasily

    identifiedandchappreciatedbythespeaker.they

    inquotient.

    59

    thepo

    yourtoolsforgothers

    kereassuringsouiyoulistentoanother

    person.alloinctstoguideyouastoouse

    the

    bineyourvocalreassuranceshgoodeyentact

    andheadnodding.together,thesesignalstellaspeaker

    thatyouarepayingattentionandthinkingaboutshe

    issaying.iftheotherpersonstartstobeereintense

    orexcited,keyourvocalreassurancesalittlelouderto

    reflectthedegreeofyouri.

    chapter17

    theeighthsignal:

    verbalreassurances

    afriendisapersoniybesincere.

    beforehiiythinkaloud.

    ralpherson

    vo.butifyou

    biheverbalreassurances,youdouble

    theiriact.eyentact,flicks,bodyines,andhead

    nodsandtiltstogetherkeagreatiressiononpeople

    butoary,

    youbeeatotallygionalist.

    thefirsttypeofverbalreassuranittal

    t

    61

    thepo

    talbeeanthatyouagree

    hisbeingsaid.has“isee,”

    “really”or“hatso,”reassurepeoplethatyouare

    listeningandkeepinginstep,butyourein

    ral.nonttale

    reassurangeneralorcasualion.theyfill

    theairduringslltalkatcktailpartiesandothersocial

    events.

    tyourselfandto

    agreeorsupportisbeingsaid,youthenusewords

    andphrasessuchas“yes,houtquestion,”ree,

    absolutely,”or“youhitthenailrightonthehead,”andthelike.

    atthistiyoubeeanallyintheionyou

    havetakensides.beforeyouoffersutsthatnvey

    agreent,alhisisyoutodo.

    essingapersonsoneofvoicealso

    hasiaethingtokesoone

    elseangrythendeclaredyourinnocebysaying,

    “butionlysaidsudsuch.”usuallytheotherperson

    respoelybysaying

    ...
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